I’ve
never been completely satisfied with the term Near Death Experience.
It’s always felt like being a “little bit pregnant”
and it seems to me one either is or isn’t…just abouts
don’t count. Prior to the term’s inclusion in
the mainstream vernacular, times were tougher for those who’d
gone beyond the veil of death and returned to be laughed at (or
locked up) when discussing what occurred to them on the otherside
of this life.Least
wise, that’s how it played out in the early 1970’s of
the american midwest, and the phrase Near Death Experience is a
damn sight better than nothin’ at all. Thankfully, there’s
now a conversationally acceptable touchstone to an otherwise totally
ignored or completely misunderstood phenomenon which has historically
been shared by millions of people all over the globe.
Decades ago no buzzwords
existed.Friends and
family suggested I needed psychiatric care, exorcism, or the wisdom
to keep my mouth shut and avoid rocking the religious boat.Chortled concern abounded. Rather than ignore the expanded
reality afforded me, I’ve given voice to the validity of the
NDE for over 30 years and been called everything from a whacked
out “Son of Satan” to a “Beyonder” for my
efforts.
My narratives are meant
to chronicle both sides of the Death Trip...the before and after
effects following in it’s wake. I’ve met many
NDErs over the last quarter of a century who confirmed the repercussions
of this experience as a being a blessing AND a curse. I’ve
come to reference the difficulties encountered upon one’s
return from the otherworlds as the dark side of the LIGHT, or Post
Traumatic Death Disorder, because it hasn’t always been rainbows,
lollipops and roses...not by a long shot.Especially is this true when one takes into consideration
the returnee has become imbued, in general, with an expanded empathetic
response.
I doubt if any of us would
take our individual life after death sojourns back or wish they
never happened at all. Still, there’s been dues to pay
along the way.Finding some manner of balance in
this world after having intimate contact with multiple dimensions
can result in difficulty relating in any of ‘em. I've
decided to share my journals with those who endure the aftermath
of the death trip as well as interested parties who wonder WHY the
NDEr tends toward radical change as a result of having had one.
I returned from the LIGHT
of my initial NDE with a glorious bang which never fizzled, yet
felt dampened in the shadows of what is viewed as everyday reality.
As mentioned, I grew up in a time and place where the notion of
a life after death trip was considered insane in some quarters and
blasphemy in others.According to the existent hierarchy, it was perfectly acceptable
to “believe, have faith, or hope fore,” but little room
existed for those who claimed direct experience of Soul’s
immortality because this stepped on far too many authoritative toes.Amidst all this, I felt an unquenchable
drive to delve deeper into the mysteries of LIFE as part of the
responsibility for having been gifted with an after death experience
in the first place.I’ve longed, sometimes desperately,
to unravel its purpose and share what part I might contribute to
the whole. It hasn’t always been a pretty sight, nor
has it been boring.
Once one crosses the threshold
of death’s door, nothing can remain the same.The core has been breeched and, by most accounts, an entirely
different set of priorities emplaced.For me, the thought of attending law school became far less
important than hunkering in a wood with Thoreau or backpackin’
down the turnpike.Metaphysics
became more intriguing than making money and archeology offered
a window of wonder that made vacation an expedition.Club Med held little charm.
Ya see, I figured if I
couldn’t garner an acceptance for the Near Death Experience
in the circles of philosophy prevailing in the midwest of the 1970’s,
then I’d expand the ripple’s radius and go lookin’
elsewhere---and so I have. I feel a need to seek out others,
from various walks of life, and determine how their cultures’
might interpret/share/utilize the benefits of this event horizon.
It’s been an indigenous trip taking me places I’d
never have gone. From the Blue Mountains of Jamaica to the
jungles of the Yucatan...from Hawaiian Oracle to Hotevilla Mesa
and a White Buffalo Calf born in Janesville Wisconsin...from a jail
cell in the Manistee Forest to wishing well the streams of the Green
Mountains...and more...and always, ALWAYS the LIGHT of the NDE;
a beacon allowing me to get back up when I’ve been knocked
down...and keep on keepin’ on.
I’ve had several
Near Death Experiences. The first of these was to take place
in early 1972, followed
by others in ‘85 and ‘87
and, again, in May of ‘95.
Each has been unique unto itself and, I’ve come to believe,
builds upon one another in a series. Currently, I’ve
decided to blog (Now
What?...Life After the Near Death Experience)
for those who’d like an in depth look at the manner in which
I’ve lived my life based on the repercussions of the NDE.
What follows on this website is an attempt at puttin' the
pieces of the puzzle together. At least, my portion of the
pie and I'd like to begin by relating what happened on old Highway
50 while cuttin' across the Sevier Desert of South Utah on October
2, 1987.
I wrote the essentials of this recap some years ago during
a "getting to know you" session in a Near Death NewsGroup
on the internet.The Heart of what occurred remains as
intact as when first submitted and I’ll serve
it up as is.
